West Sussex BBQ Meet
06th September 1997

I awoke with a hunger that I have never before known. Should I nip down to KFC for a change or being that it was Saturday 6th September, go to the BBQ Meet at Mindy's place…

A moment later, my bag was packed and I called up Slime for a lift, after I persuaded him to go. This time, he did not bring his wife. (Refer to obscure reference in Bouncy Castle report [BCR] of 26th April 1997).

A short drive later, we arrived in Sutton to pick up Matt (see BCR). After an hour of experimentation with his new laserdisc player we went shopping for BBQ type food - of which we found plenty and spent absolutely loads!

I was navigating (mainly as my reputation for such skills precedes me) and we got to the general Horsham area. Unfortunately I missed a turning, so had to take the scenic route, and after some driving down back roads arrived at Mindy's place.

We walked into the kitchen to find Mindy in some very short shorts chopping up carrots.

When I re-gathered my wits, not only from Mindy's shorts but also the carrot chopping I greeted all those already present - Mindy, Art and Archaro.

Mindy, a most excellent chef (5 quid please Min) had already laid out a selection of dips and dipping things of which we started to munch through while Mindy slipped out to erect the castle with well known techniques.

Bounce time!

Next to arrive, while we were behaving like complete nutters, was Thor, bearing a red rose for Mindy, which he was meant to bring to the Bouncy Castle meet. Still being completely sober, he did not join in the bouncing at that time. Mind you, we were sober too, but we carried on all the same!

Mindy started to light the BBQ after disembarking from the castle and Mr Whippy (see BCR) and Sarah arrived for a brief time before going on to a wedding reception.

Beermat and his flatmate Roger arrived!

After rib crushing hugs some of us were absolutely knackered from bouncing, so it was time to power up the playstation. Some serious battles involving his speed cars, high speed little cars and 2 people beating the living (expletive deleted) out of each other were played.

A while later, the BBQ was at a temperature to convert Hydrogen to Helium through nuclear fusion. The sausages were first, yummy! Well, they were yummy when I eventually got around to eating one… Mainly as I was cooking em!

Two of Mindy's work colleagues arrived - Nick and James (AKA Freddie Mercury!?) and hung around the general area of the BBQ.

While cooking burgers, Mindy produced a 12oz rump (cooked weight) steak to be devoured shortly. A short while later, it was cooked and Mindy collected it off the BBQ. A very short while after that, Mindy brought back a chunk with instructions to sterilise it after discreetly removing excess carpet fluff.

After a few more burgers and sausages had been enjoyed, the steak appeared to be ready…….

I asked Mindy if it was for any one in particular, but was told it was for general consumption. Matt volunteered to undertake the experiment and consumed it with no ill effects that have yet surfaced. (CJD = 12 years, Carpet Fluff Contents = ??)

Mindy's work colleagues - Nick and James took over the BBQ, using up the entire bag of charcoal, whether they were cooking food, or creating a Golem is still unknown.

Bounce time!! - Mainly to bounce off the food.

Rumours of Hazeii's arrival spread and he was discovered to be at the BBQ cooking his roadkill burgers.

It was getting dark. This made bouncing in the castle all the more hazardous. This included a dodgy castle burn on my elbow and a bruised ankle belonging to Mindy (unrelated).

While bouncing I noticed Beermat's watch had the power of the Schwartz, bearing in mind that mine too lit up in this fashion, I challenged him to a duel.

Mine being the blue Illuminator and his being the green Indiglo version, our battle shone throughout Horsham. Amidst the sounds from Star Wars lightsabres, Hazeii introduced himself into the battle from above by flying in from the wall of the castle. We thought it best that in the presence of the Coder, we should cease our fight and save our batteries.

Slime and myself decided to make use of the Play station time again along with supervision for a short time by Mat who fell asleep on the sofa.

After many a battle, Art thought he had learnt enough from the two masters of Martial Arts and fought us both. Art and Slime battled for well over 100 fights!

Hazeii gave his farewells and departed to Brighton.

It was getting late yet suddenly a load of new arrivals for the party turned up. These were some of the guests from wedding reception. Fun and frolics were heard from the Bouncy Castle, though as it was dark, not a lot could be seen, only imagined.

Now it was getting late, and people started to either leave or crash out in places.

Rumours spread that Roger had drunk a litre bottle of Absolut vodka, this in fact turned out to be true, which might explain the banging on the door in the early hours, which just happened to be Roger who had gone to sleep in the fields.

I was also awoken in the early hours, not by any banging… as such but by a pussy landing on my sleeping bag. Unfortunately it was only the feline kind…called Bumble.

I awoke a little after 10am Sunday to find that Matt and Mindy had gone to take the Bouncy Castle.

After making myself look as respectable as is possible I went down to the kitchen to make toast.

A while later Mindy arrived and discussions were well underway of Rogers's antics, as well as how cooked burgers managed to get pegged up onto the washing line!

It was then time for Matt, Slime and myself to say our farewells and depart.

Those present in no particular order were:-

Mindy, Zero, Slime, Matt, Hazeii, Thor, Beermat, Archaro, Art, Mr Whippy and all friends and acquaintances of the Shadists that were there.